ADHD connection self-improvement self-reflection change growth mindset vlogs: Adult ADHD: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly: My adult life with ADHD has good, bad, and ugly components. Oct-10-2022

Adult ADHD: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Subscribe to our YouTube channel

 

My life with adult ADHD has good, bad, and ugly components.

The good

There are times when I exhort my adult ADHD to sit in the driver’s seat and have a free rein in my life. These are the times when adult ADHD is unabashedly my super power. There is no doubt in my mind that I could not accomplish what I do without my ADHD.

I’ve been successful in creative and problem-solving jobs most of my life… in fact, I’d say my entire adult life. My adult ADHD has been one of my strongest assets for discovering unique solutions and creating metaphors and paradigms to communicate concepts with clients.

You could almost think of my current job as being in tech support: this time I’m working with wetware instead of hardware and software. Clients tell me what isn’t working the way they feel or hope it should, and I make suggestions on ways to improve the situation. Sometimes we make little changes to settings, other issues call for a completely new framework. My adult ADHD offers insights into my clients’ worlds in ways many other coaches have only read about.

The bad

There are many times I struggle against my adult ADHD on a regular basis, sometimes even daily.

I have tasks that are boring, repetitive, and— quite frankly, things I would simply rather not do DO NOT WANT TO DO. Organizing my workspace. Answering emails and returning phone calls. And when I owned my publishing company: monthly sales tax filings.

If I want to enjoy the good elements and outstanding successes my adult ADHD provides, I need to endure the rocky spots of adult ADHD as well.

The ugly

There are still times I want to scream, yell, tantrum, and storm out the room when my adult ADHD finds its unmitigated, unhappy voice. Chris shares advice with me for when I’m starting to feel my frustrated adult ADHD bubble to the surface: you can’t just tell a client “we’re done” and throw them out.

Like with the bad, if I want to enjoy the positive and wonderful elements of adult ADHD I need to acknowledge, direct, and manage the ugly assets of adult ADHD.

Let’s work together to discover the ways your adult ADHD is your superpower and manage the ways adult ADHD pulls you away from where you’d really like to be.



Tags for this Article

marriage counseling and sex therapy will improve your relationship

Tommy Underhill TTCD, ASDCS, ASDI Sex, Adult ADHD & Adult Autism

Tommy specializes in working with adults with ADHD and autism through a neurophysiological lens for social, relational, and sex issues. He oversees the long-term and strategic management for Littleton Couple’s Counseling. His entrepreneurship and small business management and operations span more than 30 years. Tommy is the Editor-in-Chief of the International Journal of Psychosexual Therapy. In his spare time, he runs a halfway house for wayward and abused orchids.

https://creativecontinuum.biz


Recent blogs by Tommy Underhill TTCD, ASDCS, ASDI

Marriage counseling, couples counseling, sex therapy in Littleton, Lakewood, and Denver 219
Marriage counseling, couples counseling, sex therapy in Littleton, Lakewood, and Denver 198
Marriage counseling, couples counseling, sex therapy in Littleton, Lakewood, and Denver 197
Marriage counseling, couples counseling, sex therapy in Littleton, Lakewood, and Denver 194
Marriage counseling, couples counseling, sex therapy in Littleton, Lakewood, and Denver 192
Marriage counseling, couples counseling, sex therapy in Littleton, Lakewood, and Denver 187

Search the Blog

Popular ADHD & Autism Tags


Questions Answered At a Glance

Discover what makes therapy work

What makes sex therapy different from “normal” therapy?

Sex therapy is a type of psychotherapy that focuses specifically on communication, relationships, intimacy, and sex. We often discuss low libido, desire discrepancy, painful intercourse, non-traditional relationships, orgasm difficulties, and sexual preferences.

What is sex therapy?

Sex therapy is a form of talk therapy that helps people deal with sexual problems and improve their sexual health and well-being. It’s important because we’re all sexual beings, and our mental health can affect our sexual desire and pleasure. Sex therapy can help people talk about uncomfortable things about sex, intimacy, and communication, but it’s important to remember that many sexual health problems could be solved if people talked openly about sex and their experiences.

Are you comfortable talking about ethical non-monagomy (ENM)?

Yes. Ethical non-monogamy (ENM) is a relationship style that focuses on honesty, openness, and mutual agreement when it comes to having multiple romantic or sexual partners. Whether you’re just starting to think about this idea or have been curious for a while, ethical non-monogamy can be a really liberating way to love and connect. But it’s important to know that this lifestyle might not be right for everyone. That’s totally okay. The real question is, does ENM fit with your values and emotional needs?

Can you help with struggles with sex and religion?

You might be confused about why feelings about sex are so tough when you believe “God made us as we are.” This struggle and doubt can make you feel even more ashamed and alone from your partner. You might even wonder if you’re going through religious sexual trauma, even though you were never physically abused in the church. This unwanted religious sexual dysfunction can strain your intimate relationships, and it might make the pain, guilt, and shame you’ve been carrying since you were a kid even worse. We can help.

Are our sexual wants normal?

It can be tough to figure out what’s “normal” when it comes to sex, because everyone’s different. Instead of trying to fit in with what others think is “normal,” it’s more important to listen to your own body and mind. Think about what makes you feel good and what you’ve been wanting lately. Comparing yourself to others or to porn can make you feel bad about yourself, but if you’re struggling with your sexual identity, know that you’re not alone.

My partner and I have mismatched desire. Are we normal?

A common concern is the struggle with low libido or decreased arousal. Many people experience fluctuations in their sexual desire—often due to medical conditions, stress, or other underlying factors. If your current arousal levels differ significantly from the past or from your partner, discussing it with one of our certified psychosexual therapists can help alleviate anxiety and provide guidance on how to address the issue.

How do I know when it’s time to talk to someone about my sexual issues?

If you’ve been looking for info about sex therapy and common sexual concerns, you’ve already taken a huge step towards acknowledging your worries. If your concerns keep you up a night, talking to a sex therapist could give you some clarity and help you find solutions.